Climb The Wall.

January 8, 2019

I have an anxiety disorder. In other terms I have a chemical condition in my brain that causes me to physically get up and run out of

any given room - at any given time - for any and sometimes no reason at all other than...

                                       “I have to escape.”

 

Yes, I agree, that is probably very inconvenient for you.

Yes, I do "take something for it".

Yes, I do meditate daily and maintain a very strict stable routine.
Yes, I am “talking about it with someone”.
Yes, I know Philippians 4:6 and Matthew 6:25, and any other scripture you would like to toss in my direction with the word “anxiety” in it.
But people -

This wall stands in the way of my career.
It stands in the way of my relationships with my family.
It stands in the way of my emails and text messages.

It stands in the way of my art.
It stands in the way of my relationship with food and basic nourishment.
It stands in the way of my physical health and wellness.
It is quite literally in the way of my WHOLE LIFE.
And honestly, It has kicked my grown faith in the teeth which is infuriating enough.
No, it does not sound logical. Because it isn't. 
No, I do not understand it either.
But some days I get to the end of this list and just think..


“...whelp....what do I do now?"

 

"RECKONING" (pictured above) is about the many layers of weighing anxiety, and how a small planted seed of it can affect everything moving forward. 

 

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© 2018 Emily Kay Rice

© 2018 Emily Kay Rice